Thursday, May 17, 2007

Behind Closed Doors

We've all seen it – the random couple pixel-type-humping in public places. Usually these are sims designed specifically for this type of behavior: Gor, Fetishist, or flophouses for the RL sexually deprived. But what are the 'rules' for regular ol' sims?

Picture this: You teleport into Last Call, a place full of classy and top-quality clothing/accessories. (No, I am not being paid to endorse them, it's just the truth.) You walk nonchalantly over and check out the ten million new releases. In your peripheral there is a couple, one changing into her newly bought outfits and the other watching. Just like any other couple (who doesn't know how to head home first or find a dressing room), right? You see her hands raise and extend, her fingers press and release and from the keyboard of this well dressed woman, these words:

“I want you to take me home, rip these clothes off and fuck me like you've never fucked me before!”

Not the simple 'does this make my ass look fat' you were expecting. Suddenly you feel like you're intruding – you've somehow been teleported to this couple's bedroom-conversation. Your pixel cheeks turn red, you cam away. This shiny well-built store is transformed into a dirtier version of “Pretty Woman” because someone decided to bring his whore out into pub

When this happens in real life I consider it a 'temporary loss of interior monologue' (to quote Robin Williams)because surely she didn't mean for everyone to hear it. So what - did she hop,skip, trip and miss her IM box? Possibly – but more likely is she just doesn't care.

Yes, we're all adults here, this isn't the teen grid. It was a mature sim but, regardless, have some class! We all have those times where we want to let down our prim tresses, kick off our stripper heels and get wild. Hell, I love talking like a gutter-tramp too... But you won't catch me doing it in general chat in a store that doesn't sell prim cock rings or Betty-Wetty Bondage Dolls. (Not that I frequent those kinds of places. >.>)

Now my trip is ruined and I am stuck with this mental image of you and your pay-per-half hour boyfriend teleporting home, attaching prim genitals, and 'take off'ing like mad fiends. Not only is my trip ruined, oh no, but now I can never wear that outfit without getting that same mental picture. Thanks, cunt.

To curb this behavior I have compiled a simple list of things you should think about while in public sims.

DON'T be a slut in general chat unless it's a sex sim.

Thank you.

Oh, and, for god's sake don't change into the outfit you JUST bought while still in the store. It's trashy. Would you cram your ass into a bathroom at Walmart, change, and then walk out in clothes straight off the rack? ....Ew, you're so redneck.


Alaska Metropolitan said...

This made me laugh out loud... because we've all seen it at some point! Great post.

Anonymous said...

ahhahahah. Hey funny story but why are you reading other people's conversation the first place, you peeping Tom?

I propose a better rule: any time you go into a public store, ignore all chat that doesn't belong to you, whoever came with you, and salespeople. This way, you can deny yourself the introding voyeuristic urges that have no place in any sim except perhaps voyeur sims.

What do you expect to hear in general chat in a clothing store, anyway - a thought provoking intellectual discussion whose participants are eagerly waiting your opinion on the issue with bated breath?

Everybody on the Linden planet uses general chat for personal conversations because they're immersed so much (and the IM interface clogs up the screen and switching between it and walking can be a pain in the ass).

It's also the same application of expected real-world physics that leads people to believe that what they say and do shouldn't be eavesdropped upon in the first place. Chat doesn't stop at walls so you can hear your next door neighbors getting it on in the next house over, even though pillars of virtual housing contruction may be separating you, and you may be in a private sim. Are they supposed to constantly monitor for green dots within 20m while they're talking together so they don't say something that may upset someone else who wasn't even part of the conversation?

Because of the degree of immersion and real world expectations, and because the interface can be so cumbersome for IMs, and because people don't know whether or not someone else may or may not like what they have to say to someone *else* in a mature sim, the onus on protecting others should be on the individual needing protection.

So to anyone needing this protection and who finds it difficult to stop reading general comments even after the first two words (the commenter's name) indicate whether or not you should be reading it: set Busy mode. You will no longer see any chats visually, but you can still read the chat history in case you think you missed something important (like somebody talking about how much she likes skirts in pink, I guess).

Oh, and be on your best behavior; don't scroll through the chat history looking for trouble..! Tender eyes shall forever remain safe.

Ah, and this is the first time I've seen Last Call compared to Walmart!

Laylah said...

Hey anon - Why don't you tell us how you REALLY feel? Also, I wasn't comparing Last Call to Walmart.

"Last Call, a place full of classy and top-quality clothing/ accessories."

If you consider Walmart haute couture then Yee-haw! Let's jump on your ridin mower and head on down there and git us some fancy new britches!

I was merely pointing out that if you wouldn't do it at a trashy place like Walmart then why would you do it at a classy one like Last Call?

P.S. Get your own blog. Then you can read only your own posts.. so you'll be sure to agree with yourself, right?

This blog post is meant for parody purposes only. Duh.

♥ JellyBean ♥ said...

Seriously if someone is standing in line with me at a checkout, and I hear "I wanna fuck you like a wild guinea pig" I'm going to say something. (Any of us here at MGG2SL can talk shit all day long, and do it to your face without hiding who we are) Unfortunately in SL we don't have whisper, instead we have IM and if it's too much like work to open an IM box for your sexcapade then mayhapsibly you just shouldn't do it. It has nothing to do with being an eavesdropper, it has to do with common courtesy - something a lot of people in SL lack.
Look I'm all for out of norm situations to get ya aroused, even shopping but I'm not going to let the world know in general chat.
I'm a nice person in general *adjusts halo* so I do read general chat because 8 out of 10 times someone will ask where something is (i.e new releases, hair used in ad, shoes, etc). If I can help, I do. Again it's common courtesy.
Hello I'm Jelly & I'm in your chatz reading your text pr0n.

Sasy Scarborough said...

lol Ive seen many interesting chat bits when at work as people tend to disregard my green dot altogether as I'm just staff :p but the changing in public thing is my only concern :o( I show customers clothing all day everyday in the open as that is the only place to do it , Ive had sl bug on me and ive flashed my panties and died of embarassment and Ive even lost a top when lagging and thank god for that home shortcut ctrl shift H is my best friend , but other than all that I would have to agree, adult grid or not we arent all the same and we all come from very different backgrounds and culture, so what seems harmless to some might in fact be enough to make someone log off permanently and thats the respect we need to show people , Im still going to change in public :p have to its my job but when I am out shopping and a friend says show me I'll remember my manners , lol grat post Laylah

Reznor McClure said...

Great point here on talking like a gutter-tramp. I agree on curbing any gutter-tramp dialog in public, and I will confess to this behavior. Your blog has made me think about my ethical behavior while in public and I am going on the fence on this one somewhat. Although I can't help but side with (Anonymous).... just a little bit, by the way what kind of an asshole with this strong of an opinion signs anonymous...ffs.
But what about when you are with a mob of hoes and every one is putting their two cents in. I guess one alternative is to create a group called (shop talk) or (gutter trap) or something and then group IM each other. But that is way to-much work and honestly I prefer to just get banned from stores for having this much fun.

P.S. Your reply to anon is the best (ex. P.S. Get your own blog), wow I love it, and this is way I read this blog. You tell it straight, like a real bish.

Laylah said...

You shold tote have changing rooms. Like I said, this is for parody purposes only...

[11:54] Laylah Mistral: haha.. wanna hear something funny?
[11:54] Laylah Mistral: I totally changed into a shirt I just bought before I left the store.
[11:55] Laylah Mistral: BUT - It's because I was shirtless and wasn't done shopping. I realised what I had done and changed to a different one RQ. lol
[11:58] JellyBean Madison: LOL
[11:58] JellyBean Madison: hypocrite
[11:59] Laylah Mistral: lol - I know, right!
[11:59] Laylah Mistral: I love me. ^^

BTW Reznor, I'm not talking about general gutter-talk. I'm talking about cybering and trashy "I'll suck your dick so hard your head will cave in" in general chat.

As for signing anon, I agree..

[11:15] Laylah Mistral: lol - I wonder who that was. I hate it when people post anon.
[11:15] JellyBean Madison: not sure
[11:15] Laylah Mistral: If you want to disagree at least be brave enough to do it with your own name
[11:15] Laylah Mistral: I'll talk shit all day long and I'll do it right to your face.
[11:16] Laylah Mistral: Because I am not scared of standing up and saying "Hi. I'm Laylah and I say FUCK YOU."

♥ JellyBean ♥ said...

MWAHAHAHAHA! HYPOCRITE! I wub you, you big ball of wubbers & cheese! <3

Alex Burgess said...

Thank you, Laylah, I am so with you. I usually make very pointed comments in those situations. Like, "Shut up, you skank." They *wanted* me to hear it or didn't care; they can be damn well aware I think they're a couple of no-class dimwits. And it makes for some interesting fireworks.

"anonymous"--I ignored your chat; too long and boring. Brevity is the soul of readability.

Tiana Meriman said...

i agree people need to keep their nasty talk in IM. and saying that the IM window is in the way is crap, its not that hard to just resize it.

a lot of people in sl dont seem to have basic sense. so i'm glad the sl mean girls are there to set them straight.

Gillian Waldman said...

I sent Jelly an IM a while ago while experiencing this exact scenario. Get a prim room and don't be clogging up general chat with your cheesy, pron-filled, and totally uncreative sexeh talk. Of course, in my version a child av comes in and breaks it up - which actually happened and made it *comedy gold* XD

Garbage Prototype said...

HAHA this post is amazing I love it!

Anonymous said...

"Oh, and, for god's sake don't change into the outfit you JUST bought while still in the store. It's trashy. Would you cram your ass into a bathroom at Walmart.."
" I wasn't comparing Last Call to Walmart. "

There's neither qualification nor further explanation at all in the actual comparison in the first post. The 'trashy' sentence clearly follows the sentence describing the behavior, and since most people think, read and write chronologically, it's reasonable to assume and rather obvious to conclude that the 'trashy' description was being applied to act of changing clothes in a store. Then you offered an analogy wholly independent of the prior description. Yet now you claim that you were really describing Walmart as trashy and weren't even making a comparison to Last Call, even though it's entirely obvious that the reason for mentioning Walmart was to analogize virtual behavior in a virtual store to real behavior in a real store.

"If you consider Walmart haute couture then Yee-haw! Let's jump on your ridin mower and head on down there and git us some fancy new britches!"

You compared the two - not me. I don't have the same sort of unreasonably judgemental attitude towards these types of things, so I wouldn't be able to opine. Though since you appear to be implying that low-income earners (what you call 'rednecks' -a pejorative term- who don't have a car and regard affordable clothing as 'fancy') are the likeliest to shop at Walmart, consider:

Walmart is the world's largest retailer ($350US billion+ annual revenue), whose largest customer base comprises middle-class citizens in their respective countries, not the poor (indeed, the combined disposable income of the entire global poverty classes wouldn't amount to even a fraction of that revenue). As Walmart's own research shows, its customers tend to be educated, middle-income earners who like to stretch their income for as much as it's worth (and in the case of price-conscious affluents, not feel 'cheated' out of their money):

"I was merely pointing out that if you wouldn't do it at a trashy place like Walmart.."

Maybe that's what you mean now, but it's clear what was meant initially (see above).

"P.S. Get your own blog. Then you can read only your own posts.. so you'll be sure to agree with yourself, right?"

I honestly don't think I have the time or pretentiousness required to satisfactorily maintain one. I'd rather just go around and help others' traffic numbers.

"Seriously if someone is standing in line with me at a checkout, and I hear "I wanna fuck you like a wild guinea pig" I'm going to say something."

I'll leave it to others to judge the veracity of such a claim; I myself am personally doubtful of this, especially if the persons doing the "offending" have greater physical bearing over you. But for persons who don't...well, it isn't uncommon for random people to inject themselves into the business of others for no other reason than their own innate inability to tolerate cultural differences. I personally (try to always) carry something to record, and upon being accosted, merely inform the unwanted conversational participant that s/he is being recorded (as is required in my jurisdiction) then simply ignore them. This helps if the situation escalates, and law enforcement needs to later be involved (saves time collecting witnesses for harassment/disturbing the peace/etc charges).

"if it's too much like work to open an IM box for your sexcapade then mayhapsibly you just shouldn't do it."

I disagree, because as has been pointed out, residents also have mute/busy mode/teleport/etc to proactively separate themselves from situations with which they do not want to be associated. It is to me, without a doubt, incredibly less troublesome for someone to avail themselves of these particular options for specific individuals, rather than suggest others try to guess the sensitivities of *many individuals* within their immediate vicinity (not to mention the IM/walk/shop interface pain). It is after all a mature area. There is no technical difference between a mature area for shopping and a mature area for sex; a mature area allowing adult content does not violate a term of service any more than a mature area disallowing it, such that the only rules to violate are those set up by the area owners. So absent specific rules from the parcel owners, I believe the operating assumption should be that the perceived type of venue (shop/etc) doesn't matter; mature rules apply for mature areas. For, unlike real world equivalent venues where it's not reasonable to expect that you shut your ears, people do have an option to completely ignore chats with a few clicks. In this case, asking for social conditioning as an alternative is simply unfair, especially given wildly different expected norms of behaviors in similar areas of SL, even in stores (I've been to stores that explicitly rule that sexual harassment of others in the store won't be reported, for example, while still others say it's strictly forbidden). Lest we forget that part of the reason for prohibiting "public indency" in the real world is due to intrinsic difficulty of ignoring these expressions (though arguably public areas are equivalently 'PG' in any event).

"If I can help, I do."

Well that's good.

"what seems harmless to some might in fact be enough to make someone log off permanently and thats the respect we need to show people"

Well generally I agree, but again, in this case, people voluntarily place themselves in Mature areas. For them to expect less than Mature standards, absent local rules is to me quite unreasonable. I know people who become extremely offended if someone says George W Bush is a great president. Though it's not entirely the same instincts but the same principle, to suggest that everyone around these people in "public" (which are actually private, as they pertain to SL) never praise George W Bush is rather absurd. Again, the options available to the more easily offended are less cumbersome and less restrictive of others' expressiveness, absent clear rules by the owner of the private property (be it a store or whatever).

"way what kind of an asshole with this strong of an opinion signs anonymous"

Answer: The founding member of Assholes Against Drama.

"[11:15] Laylah Mistral: I'll talk shit all day long and I'll do it right to your face."

Presumably then the "offenders" were promptly notified of your blog and your impending blog post.

""anonymous"--I ignored your chat;..."

Good! Progress is being made after all! Now we need only help others realize the ease and benefit of being proactive and helping ourselves to ignore others, rather than suggest further ways to control them.

==== Last instructions for those who prefer shorts:
==== To fully enjoy your Second Life experience, free from others' instrusion,
==== Be a leader of your own fate.
==== And live and let live, in harmony.

Crissa said...

Of course, you're really suggesting there should be changing rooms or maybe 'changing skyboxes'

As I have a furry avatar, I often try things on in stores to see if it's going to work with my avatar at all, and whether I need to buy a different color or even continue shopping in the store.

Hate it when things aren't what I thought I was buying. And there's been more than one skirt which didn't fit my bum. ...And it's not a very unusual one at that.

Laylah said...

Did it take you all day at the thesaurus to write that reply? I know you don't talk like that in real life. Go ahead, flex those syllables - Everyone knows you're just trying really hard to seem smart.

I was going to read your entire post, Anon, really I was... But I can fake an orgasm better than I can fake being interested in your opinion so instead I'm going to go have cyber in the middle of a church in general chat. Someone get my Betty-Wetty Bondage Doll!

The only part of this long-winded, pompous reply that caught my eye was "Presumably then the "offenders" were promptly notified of your blog and your impending blog post."

This did not happen to me - a fan ask that the MG cover the subject. However, if I had the person's name I would send her an IM and let her know.

It's not YOU is it? Is that why you're debating? Do you need a hug?

If you knew me or Jelly at all you'd never question that we'd say something to someone in real life if they were being a stupid whore. I am a loud-mouthed little thing and I *always* speak my mind.

(Ex. One morning I was in Caribou getting coffee. The place had *just* opened and the servers were still getting into the groove of the day. We were chatting and laughing when this woman came in. She stood there for roughly 30 seconds before sighing loudly, looking at her watch and finally yelling to the staff to "quit talking to each other and hurry it up, I'm in a rush! You don't get paid to visit!" You could see the poor server's smile just fall. Completely ruined her day and all because this woman is in a rush after 30 seconds. The whole store got quiet. I turned to her and said loudly "Stop being a cunt! These people's lives suck hard enough having to work HERE and deal with people like YOU every single day. You don't like the service you can leave - I promise we won't be heart broken." Everyone just cracked up and the woman stormed off. I got free coffee. Yay!)

Oh, also "... The founding member of Assholes Against Drama." HAHAHA - You are at the WRONG blog, or did you not read the synopsis?

Silent Sonnet said...

Hmmm... I love it when people try and rub their words in others only makes them seem more like a douchebag.

If you plan on writing a novel all about your rebellious nature and debate on the topics at hand in a very long and drawn out message...

Just sum it up into something much more simple. If you honestly feel people will gain anything from some 5-page debate on why your penis is bigger than everyone else's...take a fucking number with all the other assholes in the same boat as you.

Welcome to 2007. People don't talk in complete novels or it takes 30 minutes of banging on drums to press a point.

We talk in short blocks. Quick,

So next time you decide to respond with dramatic prose, remember me. And think about how much of your life you've WASTED trying to convey a point which no one gives a shit.

You'd be better off saying nothing at all, because that's exactly the effect you will have.

Congrats to you whoever the fuck you made no sense, wasted your life conveying points to yourself, and wasting server space for your pathetic attempts at intelligence.

Akasha =^.^= said...

Alright, I just have to add my 1 cent. I didn't read any of anon's posts becasue well I don't read posts that are put up by people who can't say who they are. That and omggggg they were so damn long I got bored looking at them!!!! I did read everyone elses and they are all great and I'm really very glad to see so many people participating in discussions about our subjects!!! Makes me all warm and fuzzy inside, well either that or the pasta and shrimp I had for dinner.

So I'll just say this.. Loved the post lala You are smoking hawt as always!

I do have to admit I change clothes any time I want, but then again I don't get naked to do it and No I would never changed in rl just standing there. Unless I could do it without getting naked *which I have done in my younger years*

Also I don't think I have ever said "I want to fuck you like an animal" or anything like that in open chat, NO wait I have when I sang NIN's Closer once or twice.. So does that count? Although it was at a club.. O.o LOL