Pop Goes the Weezel

Ok.. yeah I admit it.. Imma Mean Girl.. Always was and always will be. Come on People, we ALL have that streak in us somewhere, but its not the mean streak thats a problem, its how you use it. Some of us use it with finesse to enlighten others. Some use it to open the door for a well needed change. But there's those that use it for their own personal gain with no regard for anything or anyone outside their own twisted head So with that thought in mind I have decided to get a lil mean for enlightment purposes and expose those who abuse their meaness at the expense of others :P As a long time resident of SL I think I have enough experience in this area to warn fellow residents to this type of predator and my only hope is that these words can spare someone the agony of experiencing and dealing with them. First of all there are "real people" in here who are genuine and find places in our hearts..They are our True Friends and relationships we have with them are endless and boundless. We can talk about our RL's and share bad times as well as good times. Then there's those who use this place and the people in it for amusement at the expense of others. You WILL run into them and lets make sure you're well armed and can run them over when you do:P Let's analyse this a little deeper in case study form using a person we'll call Tiny Toon.. Tiny Toon is a desperate little man that honestly thinks he's all that and presents himself as such. He will start a convo with his usual charm making you feel like this is the 1st time he's ever done this. He may even tell you this IS the "1st time" hes met anyone as wonderful as you. He will take great pics of your avatar and make you feel like you are the sexiest and most desirable girl in here ( all the while hes doing this to 2 or 3 other chicks too.. and more prolly than not.. your good friends. ) He will play songs on his stream and say they remind him of you. Yes, Ladies the "woo'ing" is intense. In some weird way Tiny Toon has a hard time understanding friendships and the loyalties they possess. Valuing friendships seems to elude him and therefore he has no respect for any one else's friendship. He will use one friend against another, whispering half truths and his own point of view in your friends ears and when he does this to the gullible and lovelorn he succeeds and the result is the loss of a friend for YOU and a new victim for him. Tiny Toon lacks the maturity and masculinity to befriend another man, instead he finds fault in ALL men around him. He doesn't seem to have the emotional ego to share this place with other males. On the other hand Tiny Toon is VERY egotistical, when he's not telling you how sexy and beautiful you are, he's telling you how talented and wonderful he is. He sorta fills the whole conversation with his thoughts, words and opinions. He also hates hearing about your RL, especially the happy parts.. If you mention the nice dinner you had with your rl hubby or boyfriend you are accused of being insensitive to his feelings and asked not to do that again. Tiny Toon will however pass you notecards from other women he's currently flirting with in here as "proof" of how lucky you are that he's with you. In the beginning you are in awe of his prowess and intellect but after a while you open your eyes and start thinking "Am I ever right? Do I have any worthwhile thoughts? Why am I feeling hostility towards my friends? and Why cant I talk about my RL?:( This is when the problem starts. This is when you realize that the world he's created for the both of you is only meeting his needs. For a while you try and find what went wrong and you're told it's all your fault cause your not understanding or you take things out of context. In the beginning you 2nd guess yourself and even walk on eggshells around him, trying to be perfect so he will tell you those sweet, romantic things he used to tell you. What you havent realized or dont want to realize is ..He IS saying them.. only to someone else LOL. So Girls Arm Yourself before he strikes.. He moves from friend to friend like locust,, bad-mouthing everyone who even gets an inkling to his true motives. Stay close to your real friends.. Never let a piece of pixel cock come between you and them. I know SL is a playground for this preditor but the more people that are educated and aware of him the better off we all are.. This is PetMe signing off and remember.. Never be afraid to say whats on your mind.. even if its Mean :P. Those who love you won't be suprised and the rest.. well they'll get over it eventually :P

>>-PetMe->

It's.....

We've all seen one, that person who you catch a glimpse of on your mysti tool and gone "ZOMG it's like HER!!!" to yourself. Well stop with the sycophancy and get your arse certifiably famous.

First of all fame needs a name, and in SL it's easy. Things to remember.

DON'T put stupid numbers in your name. Anyone remember Rebecca1976 Bergman? No.

DON'T, for the love of god, call yourself after anyone already famous. That's just silly.

DO make it memorable, being a household name is easier if people can remember it.



Place's to be seen and not to be seen.

Do hang around in pricey classy shops. Better yet, if the owner of the shop is there, strike up a conversation, tell them briefly (make sure no one is around) that you adore their stuff. Then witter on about badgers and the price of cheese for as long as possible. Anyone else arriving at the shop will be awestruck to see you on such pally terms with their designing god/goddess. Also after the event you can say to folks "Oh well yes, I was talking to earlier, she's releasing a new set of shoes which she gave to me but OBVIOUSLY I can't show you because it's a secret."

DON'T hang around the welcome area. Newbies will not care who you are.

DO go to the opening of an envelope. Wear something fabulous and say something witty. Try to appear like you're a friend of the other famous people there.


Dealing with the Press.

I generally find that the press are a funny bunch, but there is no such thing as BAD PRESS! Got caught on your hands and knees in Hard Alley? Simply release a heartfelt statement of regret, or you can declare that you're having a nervous breakdown. Old porn film surfaced on some bitching blog, laugh it off, you were young, precocious, got in with the wrong crowd/partner. It's all good baby.
Of course there are members of the press fraternity who's sole aim in life is to make you look bad. Laugh it off, smile and say you thought their post was hilarious. Keep telling yourself "They only say it because they want to be me".


No press at all? Make your own. An alt is an excellent way to start rumours about yourself. The more contraversial, the better.


What to wear and more importantly what not to wear.

DON'T wear bling. Ever.

DO wear the latest things. Scour the forums (forget the blogs, if someone has already blogged it, it's not new).

DON'T answer questions about where you got an item you were wearing in IM's. You have to show the world that people adore your style.

DO be different. Turn up to a product launch in casual clothes/nakie/clothes made by another designer. You know your a sycophant, but no one else needs to.



Other points to note.

DO change your partner frequently, a blanketing silence over the end of a relationship is a sure fire way to get tongues wagging. This will also help covering up more embarrassing rumours about your person, blame it on the ex.

Less is more only with clothes darling, you need to be seen everywhere!

With that in mind DO start a blog, or better still. Join someone elses already well established blog.

DO things for charidee, not only do you get a warm snuggly feeling but you will instantly appear generous in the eyes of your public (WARNING: Do not give to charity after a scandal. It will make you appear fickle)

DO keep your old friends, you never know what secrets they may divulge, however dropping them can be useful for creating press if neccessary.

Stick to these guidelines and within weeks you shall find yourself laughing it up with the A-list and being bitched about on the forums.

Congratulations!

DOs & DON'Ts - Take Deux

Spinning off of my Duffle-bagging post, I have for you some DOs & DON'Ts for SL. You would think most of this is common sense, but nah, it's not because if it were, why would I need to say it? Yah, that's what I thought. This list is compiled from a friends list survey. What does that mean Jell? Well, it means, it's not just my opinion, DUH! Let's start with the DOs...

DO:

• Guys wear a shirt - just because you walk around with one off, doesn't mean we're compelled to strip ours off to join you. Yes, we know you think your skin is teh awesome.
• Be random. Nobody likes a clone.
• Make friends - you can never have too many.
  
• Play Tringo (haha)
• Say "Hello" to strangers. Yah, be aloha bitches!
  
• Organize your inventory. Cleanliness is next to Lindeniness
• Be respectful.
• Try and figure things out for yourself. There are a ton of facts and FAQ's on the website.
  
• Clean up after yourself. (seriously build a prim and leave it at my house, I'll punch your mom in the head & bleed you).
• Be helpful when possible.
• Take into consideration that the people you encounter are REAL people playing just like yourself and can be affected by you and what you say/do.
  
• Expect to have to buy Lindens (at some point) otherwise you're going to look like a tard.
  
• Dress in Transformer AV's and have sex in public on a dance club - how often do you get to see Optimus prime fuck Megatron?
• Try and make something. SL is special because it's content is user created, and everyone's first try was bad. You can and will get better.
• Nooblets: Spend the first 3 months traveling around.
• Buy shoes before drama.
• Ask advice.
• Turn off your talking tummies - I don't give a shit that you're expecting a prim with eyes, much less do I wanna hear how a script says you're feeling.
• Detach Xcite parts or you may become a victim of my Highlighted Transparent Bits post.
• wear pants...pants are good. Certain attachments worn over pants are not.
• Click peoples Xcite shit in a club for no reason. If they didn't want you to poke their jibblies, they'd take 'em off.
• Take screenshots of peoples weird discolored prim balls.

DON'T:

• Overly use obnoxious gestures. Seriously as a noob, grabbing all the free gestures you can should not be priority over skin & hair. DUH doofus.
• Wear bling.
• Ask RL stuffies within minutes of meeting someone.
• Be insanely quiet. We *will* talk about you & make shit up.
• Talk to Black Summers.
• Open an IM to an escort. (sorry Dancer)
• Buy land from anyone claiming they're doing you a "favor".
• Build a lagtastic casino anywhere near Krius or he'll shoot you in the face.
  
• Open an IM to a male escort.
• Offer friendship without saying "hello" or anything first, ever!
• Shoot random people in a non-combat zone.
• Have noobtatstic sex right in public on a dance club.
  
• Just walk into someone's house, just because it's land and you can get in doesn't mean you're supposed to.
• Be afraid to try new things. You might like being a Gorean Furry Ageplayin' Bukkake Thug...probably not though. Especially if there's bling.
• BE A CRAZY STALKER!
• Hold SL above RL.
• Expect sex.
• Be afraid to be yourself.
• Beg for money - You can always play tringo :p
• Lie about yourself, because you may end up regretting it.
  
• Nooblets: stop at the first nice place you find.
• Let your inventory get out of control.
• Be an asshole - SL is full of them, no need for too many over-achievers.
• Be a dramite - but it's okay to laugh at other people's drama. Rofl. Fooking Spoon Carriers!
• Be a braggart - No one cares if you won the SLdrama award.
• Particle spam!
• Type out the lyrics to a song that's playing. It makes you a candidate for face stabbin.

This is just a short list. I'm sure there's more to proper casual SL etiquette, but well, it's possible that I didn't catch it in this post. Feel free to add your two Ls in comments if you think I missed something.

Jell